Child Self Esteem

Building Child Self Esteem is the Most Important Job of Parenthood


From the moment your child is born, his or her child self esteem and sense of self worth is built from your words, touch, tone of voice and facial expressions. 

Children begin to form their self identity at birth. Self esteem is the armor that protects them later from the pitfalls of drugs, alcohol, unhealthy relationships and delinquency. Child self esteem keeps demons away. 

Parents are the most important people in their children’s lives. Parents are the strongest influences on how a child feels about him or herself. Teachers are a close second. Kids are vulnerable. Like plants in a garden, they need a healthy environment in order to mature well and build child self esteem. 

Parents are the Most Important People     in their Children's Lives

Parents are the strongest influences on how a child feels about him or herself. Teachers are a close second. Kids are vulnerable. Like plants in a garden, they need a healthy environment in order to mature well and build child self esteem. 

You want the best for your kids. You want them to be happy, successful and able to build relationships with confidence. You want them to use their talents and create a healthy world for themselves. Children with excellent self esteem have unique chances to be well grounded adults. 

If, as a parent (or a teacher), you had a challenging childhood leaving you with shaky adult self esteem, you can build your own self esteem in order to create a positive healthy environment for your children or students. It’s absolutely doable. 

Being grounded, having control over your feelings, getting along well with others and keeping cool under pressure are high indicators of strong emotional intelligence. 

A parent with this emotional strength will have the basis for developing his or her children’s positive sense of self, for supporting the child’s growing responsibility and self regulation. The foundation for child self esteem begins with parents. 

Begin now to gain optimism and self esteem, if not for your own sake, for the sake of your children, pupils or students. Check out emotional intelligence to improve your emotional groundedness. 

If you have fearsanxieties or feelings of helplessness left over from your own early years, begin your own growth and healing with the support you’ll find on this site. 

Also check out Self Esteem Exercises and Self Esteem Activities for lots of helpful tools, strategies, information and support. 

Go to Building Child Self Esteem for more tips on developing a nurturing environment for your children. 

Your own parents led you to feel degrees of effectiveness or helplessness, intelligence or stupidity, worthlessness or lovability. 

You wanted to please your parents, just as your children now want to please you and receive your recognition.

The connection between your self esteem and your child's self esteem

Your child can sense the way you feel about yourself. The way you raise your child is affected by your own self esteem.

Five top tips self esteem building tips for you!

  • Believe in yourself. Children are very tuned into your state of mind. If your thoughts and actions create a negative home environment, your children will view the world as a less positive place than they would in a supportive atmosphere. Their understanding of success in life will diminish. They will feel less confident about themselves and less sure of you. Children absorb the things they see and hear like sponges. They pick up the habits of the people they most trust, admire and respect. Children self esteem depends upon your words and actions.
  • If you are afraid you might not succeed at something new, push through your fear and do it anyway. What do you have to lose? If you fear of losing credibility, being judged or criticized by friends, family or co-workers, give yourself courage by remembering that making mistakes is the best tool for learning. Prepare well for your new activity and keep at it. Practice makes perfect. Maintain friendships that nurture and support you. Choose to be with people who have your best interests at heart.

For more information, go to building child self esteem.


  • Avoid self criticism and self doubt. Instead, set manageable goals for achievable dreams. If you aren’t happy with your results, try again.
  • Eliminate negative self talk. What you say to yourself is created by you. It’s the script you have written for yourself. It’s your own drama. You can rewrite your script. Don’t hesitate on this tip because the voice in your head determines your self esteem and it will determine children self esteem too.
  • Celebrate and acknowledge your own accomplishments. When you recognize a personal achievement, your self esteem and confidence grows. Courage grows with every success.

Child self esteem is profoundly affected by bullying. Be engaged with your child in order to spot bullying problems. For help with bullying, have a look at:

what is bullyingbullying, bullying facts, bullying statistics, the effects of bullying, the bully, cyber bullying, school bullying, stop bullying.

Child self esteem grows with your caring, your appreciation of their unique personalities that my be very different from theirs. Have the courage to engage with your kids honestly and with respect and they will grow into happy self respecting adults. 

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